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Millie Rose - My Birthing Story

125.

Well...Millie Rose Howlett arrived! The little miss was born at 16:22 on Wednesday 14th June 2017 weighing a solid 8lbs exact! And my god what a quick arrival she made!!

Let's start from the beginning shall we? So on the Monday I woke up at half past 5 in the morning with pains in my thighs, I wondered if they were the beginning of labour but I held off calling the hospital because they were bearable and didn't have any routine to them plus I was seeing the midwife that morning for my second sweep so I really hoped she was going to say that it was starting...she said the opposite! She said nothing was happening, I still had a very long way to go and I'd more than likely be induced as I was 8 days over by this point anyway. After that appointment the pains stopped so I was sat thinking GREAT (in a very sarcastic fed up tone) but then they started again that afternoon stronger than the morning but still bearable. I did get my mum to come to my house because we were all sure that it was starting. 

So I never slept that whole night as they were about 7 minutes apart and painful! The following day, Tuesday, they got even stronger but still 7 minutes apart. When we called the hospital they told me to go to ADU to be assessed. Again we were all convinced it was happening but when I was examined, turned out nope! not a lot had happened, I was about 1cm dilated but again the midwife said I'd have to be induced at the weekend. She actually said to me I'd know I'd be in labour as I wouldn't be able to talk and I'd be doubled over in pain making all sorts of noises. My reply was 'they are painful tho' but she totally disregarded how I was feeling and made me feel a little stupid tbh. So off we went back home for another sleepless and painful night.

Roll on Wednesday morning! The pains had become so bad in my legs I was getting Rob and my mum to rub them. The pains were every 6 minutes now but so so strong, I was crying at some points because I was so tired and my legs were in so much pain each time the pains came. I never had any pains in my tummy might I add. Every one was in my outer thighs!

As the morning went by I was in more and more pain, so we called the labour ward again, only to hear 'this isn't labour go back to the ADU' my words to my mum were 'if this ain't fucking labour, I don't know what fucking labour is!' Clear to say I was fed up!

We went back to the ADU which was jam packed of pregnant ladies, the lady next to me was clearly having pains too as she kept standing up rubbing her belly panting. I was sat gritting my teeth now every 3 minutes trying to casually rub my thighs without looking like a freak as each pain came. After over an hours wait I got called in by a lovely student nurse who saw the pain in my face and was baffled about them only being in my legs but she believed me, finally someone believed me!! She did her examination and then a senior nurse examined too and they both said I was 7cm dilated and my waters where bulging! A little nudge and POP out came the waters! To which my mum burst out crying and me and rob were in shock I think realising that a baby was well and truly on the way! The nurse then told us if we had left it and my waters had gone naturally the baby would have been out with them so thank god we were in hospital! 

As I was 10 days over by this point they told us that Millie had done a severe poop inside so I was wheeled straight up into my birthing room! Once in that room the pains came thick and fast, I refused pain relief because I was more scared of feeling sick or being sick than actually giving birth so I breathed through each pain whilst turning robs hands purple in the process!! 
Maybe after an hour or 2 of being in that room they examined me again and said I was 8cm, well as soon as she said that I had a very sudden overwhelming feeling to push like I've never pushed before! They reassured me that my body was now going to take over and I was to go with it, and go with it I did! Less than half an hour of pushing later Millie was born! And I believe my words where 'what the hell just happened?' Haha! And I remember just asking if I had done it whilst holding her on my chest. It happened so quickly I never had the chance to process that it was happening! But maybe that is exactly how it should have been for me. I had no time to over think or get scared, I just dealt with the pains and pushed until I went blue supposedly! 

I amazed myself, rob, my mum and also all the nurses. They were shocked at how well I coped with the pain and how I had no pain relief what so ever. Especially with it being my first child. 

Those 3 days of pains were instantly forgotten as soon as Millie was on my chest, it was the most amazing experience of my life! 

Today Millie is 13 days old and my god they have flown by! It's crazy to think about her not being in our lives before. I can't remember the feeling of pregnancy, I don't miss my bump because she's just so amazing! Yes I'm tired, I get a bit teary at times because I have no idea what I'm doing but I wouldn't change a thing! The love is so strong and so real it's blindsided me.

The icky details are I did tear so I got stitches and yeah you see stuff that you don't wanna see and there's a lot of blood but you just don't care, well I didn't, I'd do it again...only once more!  

So that's it, that is my birthing story. A story I'll cherish and remember forever.




Much love
Beth xx

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