My Outlook on Life

106.

I recently got asked if my outlook on life has changed since losing my Dad. I struggled to think of an answer. When he passed away my life felt so consumed by the loss and also the emotions I felt building up to the day he passed away, it's hard to think about how I was as a person before it all. 

I maybe don't see life differently as such but I see people differently. Before I would be quite narrow minded, black and white. So if someone was acting different to what I classed as 'normal' I would label them weird. I couldn't see a reason behind their actions. But now I see that not everything we see as passers by is concrete information. We have literally no idea what goes on behind closed doors. We don't know other people's struggles. I've learnt to have patience, more respect and more understanding. 

Don't get me wrong naturally for a while my thoughts where 'live everyday as your last' etc etc but the way I am, it's not a characteristic I have. My life soon became controlled by anxiety and routine like it most likely always had been. As time goes by that'll either get better or get worse. I can only live my life to find out. 

I guess the question should be asked to those around me because I only see my life the way I believe it's always been. I've just gained a better understanding of others. 

I'm still smiling, still laughing and still surviving. 

Love,

Beth xx

bethsblog90@gmail.com